Remember when we were kids? Everything was possible.
And then we failed a few times. We were hurt. We started to be afraid of expecting more, believing more. We thought the same bad event would happen again anytime soon, but it won’t.
Is it worth the time to think that way?
I think what matters is not what happens to us, but how we respond to it. If we change the way we think, we can see an opportunity in every problem. If we are negative, we can only see problems. Before proceeding, I would share some thoughts about worrying. It is something all of us experience, yet we perceive it differently.
What is worrying?
- Worrying is thinking about a problem longer than thinking about the solution.
- Worrying is an input that does not produce output.
- Worrying is not an action, it is about doing nothing. It is about thinking of 10 ways things can go wrong.
Solving a problem is an input that produces output.
Being an optimistic and careful person is about thinking of 10 ways to solve the 10 possibilities of how things could go wrong! We feel secure because we already know how to solve it. Isn’t it better than just thinking about the scary problems?
Where would we want to be in? In the optimistic team or the pessimistic team?
Two mindsets to stay positive at the worst times:
Action and hustle are cures for doubts.
I had an accident that may cause me to lose my right hand in 2011, it was run over by a car after I fell from a motorcycle. My right hand was almost amputated. I continued to believe in myself and I told / begged / forced the doctor to never amputate or cut off my hand.
They didn’t amputate it, but my right hand was in a very bad condition. I couldn’t move my hand at all. I was grateful and was told that I needed to work very hard to gain back my hand’s functionality. I needed to go through a total of four surgeries and 8 months of (painful) physiotherapy as my hand was stiff and they needed to bend it manually. I needed to start learning to move / use my hand again. I started by picking up balls and lego parts, forcing my brain to be able to control my hand. Long story short, I can use my right hand for daily activities now, including typing this blog post. I even went to the gym to lift some light weights. 🙂
If I were to spend my time worrying about the possibilities of my right hand becoming disabled, I would never have the time to work hard. Instead, I focus on hustling to get my right hand back. My actions and hustle made me forget to doubt about my capabilities. My capabilities expanded together with my positive belief. My focus is on success and I succeeded.
We can choose to spend 10 hours of worrying or 10 hours of hustling! 10 hours of worrying won’t give any good outcome, it is passive. 10 hours of hustling will give an outcome, it can be good or bad, but take chances! It usually makes us forget about worrying. It just makes more sense to work harder. 🙂
Know our value. We are still worthy for who we are, not only for what we have achieved and what we have failed.
Some of us may think that our success defines who we are. However, is it true? We are defined by who we are. If we believe in our own value, we can always start again. Our value is not how people value us. Our value is about how we value ourselves! Love ourselves and people will do the same.
If you are a piece of gold, do you become mud when you are thrown into the mud? No, you are still a piece of gold. The problem here is if you do not come out from the dirt and do not wash yourself. You will be seen as mud by others. You will start to believe that you are just mud. We need to get out of the mud and wash ourselves. We need to believe in our own value. We can always start again, try again, and believe again.
The gold in the mud
During the California Gold Rush in 1848, everyone was working hard to find gold. The interesting part is this, the only place we can find unrefined and natural gold is in the mud!
If gold can only be found in the mud, don’t you think it’s possible that our blessings might be hidden in the unfortunate events and worst situations in our lives?
Our perspective matters
Positivity is good. It makes us happy and excited about what we do.
Positivity is also bad. It makes use careless sometimes. We might think that nothing would go wrong, which is foolish. Things go wrong and we just have to make it right again.
Do not avoid negativity. It is the root of better results.
Negativity is good. It is what makes a perfectionist. Every great leader or entrepreneur has insecurities, which makes them work harder than everyone else.
Negativity is also bad. It consumes our soul. The idea is to use negativity to improve ourselves, not exhausting ourselves.
Everything is possible. Stay alert, stay hopeful.
If you have thoughts, reach me: firstname.lastname@example.org