This post is not about being strong physically, it is about being strong mentally.
Why do people run, lift weights? How does that contribute to their muscles and stamina?
It is known that when we lift weights, we stretch our muscles’ capabilities and “break” some of them. After that, when our body consume protein and regenerate our muscles, they become stronger.
So how do we actually be strong mentally? I understand how. It is by going through hardship, struggles, and pain. Of course, there is another way, by using the power of loving and being loved. However, this post is not about that.
I have gone through a lot of struggles previously in my life, which I can’t share all of them here. But I can share to you one. I had an accident that almost took away my right hand. It was almost amputated. My right hand was run over by a car on 12th of May, 2011. I will never forget that day. That accident changed my life, for the better and for worse.
Through hardships, I did not lose my right hand and am able to use it again, including writing with it.
What I have learnt is that the best way to be stronger mentally is to go through daily pain, pressure, hardship, struggle, challenges. After the accident, I am 10 times stronger than before, I am able to fight for whatever I think I deserve.
Until now, I always avoid being too comfortable. If I am too relaxed, I will ask myself, “Am I doing more than my best?”
Because if I am not doing more than my best, I won’t be better.
On 12th of May in 2011, who would have predicted that the young man who almost lost his right hand that day, has never given up and become 10 times better than before? No one else other than my mom, whom he will forever thank her for her love. But what is going to happen is this, he will be 100 times better, achieving great things. All because he promised himself that he will make use of the hardship he has gone through, to become a reminder that, nothing is impossible.
I recently read the biography of Elon Musk, founder of PayPal, Tesla, SpaceX. It had validated my hypothesis that strength and greatness come from necessity, hardship, struggle, and challenges. Elon has gone through a tough childhood in South Africa. He fought his way through to Canada, then to the United States. He slept on his friend’s couch while founding his first company. Tesla and SpaceX almost went bankrupt again and again. Yet, he didn’t give up. His strength is admirable, his strength came from his past struggles.
Next will be something you never read.
How to create hardship
Because hardship is what creates strength, directly or indirectly. Strength produces greatness, resilience, achievements.
We need to instill in our mind that we have to fight for something. We need to push ourselves further than ever. We need to be the best at whatever we are doing.
While not everyone will get an accident to create a life of hardship, or other challenges such as bankruptcy. Everyone can do these:
1. Never compare yourself with your peers.
It won’t make you feel worse. You need to feel worse to create a life of hardship. You need to admire the best people in your country, or in the world. You are going to be like them. Never think you are good enough.
2. Feel proud but not arrogant.
Be humble, there are great people out there. This links to number 1, admire only the best, not the people around you just for the sake of they are around you. Never think that you are the best.
3. Dream bigger.
Do not agree with common beliefs of what is the “right” goal. People are usually wrong. You can set your own terms. Big dream gives big pressure. This pressure will help you grow.
4. Understand the bottom.
Meet the people who suffer the most or in poverty. Live like them for a few days. Understand how they feel. It will make you tough and understand how things work in their perspectives. You will understand why crimes in India and China are not the same with crimes in the United States.
5. Take risks.
Always take calculated significant risks. Risks give you pressure, which is good. It makes you focus and stay sharp. This pressure will create daily struggles. You will worry, and it makes you stronger.
All of the above will make you stronger, or it will break you forever. Bend, don’t break.
If you have further thoughts, reach me: vincent.huberta@gmail.com
Always rethink,
Vincent
Will you say that list apply to everyone? I would say it’s certainly not. At least not for me. I had anxiety attacks recently due to mother-load of stress. So I read your post. There are few things which I realised.
1. Not everyone is optimistic. I can’t foresee myself doing this all the time. I would “break”.
2. Different people have a different level of willpower. Not everyone is a risk-taker.
3. I would say Time is the essence here (if I were to practice all of these)
4. Spelling mistake (number 2) ;D
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In reality, this list could apply to everyone if the challenges occur when they were very young. Children will break, but most won’t die / suicide. Look at all the world war survivors, they have built the economy of the world. After returning from despair, most will be stronger, some will be weak. Everyone is a risk taker when the reward is perceived higher than the cost. That’s why people gamble. While most people are not experts in assessing value and reward. Indeed, time is the essence, but a little insanity will accelerate. Thanks for pointing out, have just fixed the error. 😀
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